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The Steve WenPetren Project, Parts 7 and 8

For those who missed it, check out Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5 and Part 6 of my series on how to stop being a terrible golfer.

So where has my golf blog been the past two weeks? I can ask the same thing about my golf game, which decided to abandon a couple of weekends ago as I shot a crowd-pleasing 117 which included at least a dozen penalty strokes and a few missing sleeves of golf balls. The one positive to that 117, and really when you shoot a 117, it’s important to find that silver lining, was that I didn’t have a single three-putt until the 18th and final hole.

And that in essence is part of the true beauty of the game, it’s unpredictability. They say in football, any team can win on any given Sunday, but in golf, you can shoot a 117 on any given Sunday (or Saturday in this case). Heck, on any given Sunday, a cigar smoking, over-40 Irishman can win the British Open for his first major championship. But I could just as easily shoot a 97 the next time I play that course, as easily as I shot that terrible triple-digit score. So while it was easily the worst scoring round I’ve had since starting lessons, it was also the best putting round I’ve had since starting lessons. Ironically, putting hasn’t been covered yet in my lessons, so I’m self-taught for the time being.

But thank you to readers Kevin Low and John Sheeler for inviting me out for a fun time, even if I did a fantastic job of embarrassing myself. I will have a much better showing next time out, I can guarantee that since it couldn’t get any worse.

LESSON #7 – IF THE CLUB DON’T FIT, YOU MUST ACQUIT

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The Steve WenPetren Project, Part 6

For those who missed it, check out Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4 and Part 5 of my series on how to stop being a terrible golfer.

Before delving into last week’s lesson, let me enlighten you with a story.  Hours before my lesson, I left work early to play 18 holes of golf at Herndon Centennial with a co-worker.  It’s not the most challenging of courses, but when you’ve got a “work-in-progress” golf game, these courses are appreciated.  After opening with a devastating triple-bogey, I hit a nice 3-iron off the 2nd tee, a short par-4, right into the middle of the fairway, about 145 yards away.

At this point, there was a foursome ahead of us on the green, which consisted of a guy so old he might have been around when golf was invented, and a teenager who obviously had studied my original tapes on how to swing a golf club prior to my lessons.  They signaled for me and my buddy to play thru, so we took them up on that.  Knowing that all four of them were watching added a little extra pressure to the shot.  If I flubbed it, which I’m still prone to doing occasionally, will they re-think letting us play through?  Will the old man beat me over the head with his putter and call me a whippersnapper?  Long story short, I hit a perfect 7-iron to within four feet of the hole!  From there it was a matter of making a knee-knocker of a putt, which felt like it took forever to go from off my putter to the hole, but sure enough it made it then and into the cup for my first birdie in over three years!!!

It was my only birdie of the day (although I did lip out for birdie on the next hole, a par-5), but it didn’t matter, because I felt alive on the course the rest of the day and knew that Steve’s lessons were really doing the trick.  Thankfully I didn’t get too arrogant and think I was ready to turn pro and showed up for my lesson later that day with Steve.

LESSON #6 – ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT

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SAS Movie Review – Bad Teacher

SAS = Short Attention Span – basically if you’re like me, you don’t want to read a 3 page review of a movie that’s filled with dictionary look-up words and talks in-depth about the subtle nuances and how they correlate to post-modern, neo-classical, Machiavellian, or whatever random crap that was probably taught to me in school years ago, but has since been replaced with useless knowledge about things that would only help me in a People magazine crossword puzzle.

The point is, I will only write a simple review, nothing more than a page, and nothing that will ruin any aspect of the movie (I hope). So enjoy.

BAD TEACHER

I’m not a fan of Cameron Diaz, in fact it’s very hard to look at her stretched out, over-tanned face over the course of 90+ minutes.  That being said, this was easily her most enjoyable role in well over a decade.  Seriously, not since Y2K did she have any roles where she contributed to a good movie she was in (I’ll argue all day that she was not the best option in Vanilla Sky or Gangs of New York).  But Bad Teacher was simply put, a funny script, solid acting and the first time I didn’t mind that old face of hers since Any Given Sunday (1999).

On the heels of Bridesmaids, which I have been singled out as the only person in America that didn’t think the movie was funny, this was a refreshing comedy that didn’t necessarily rely on toilet humor to get the laughs across.  A good comedy doesn’t go for the home run of over-the-top or gross out jokes and then sits back the rest of the film and get sappy, but instead should keep you laughing throughout, even if it’s not Ben Stiller zippering his beans above the franks.  And that’s what you’ll get for 90+ minutes with Bad Teacher, solid laughs throughout.

Although Diaz did a stellar job in keeping the movie together throughout, the supporting cast might have been the true stars.  Jason Segel surprisingly continues his run of being a funny leading man (Forgetting Sarah Marshall, I Love You Man) and I wouldn’t be shocked if he is this decade’s Vince Vaughn, although I’m not sure if that’s a compliment or not.  Justin Timberlake’s sensitive character was just goofy enough where it was believable verging on ridiculous and with his previous roles in Alpha Dog and The Social Network, he’s proving that he could possibly challenge Will Smith for best singer/actor of our generation.  And little unknown Lucy Punch (terrible stage name), holds her own as the “good teacher” to Cameron Diaz’ title character.

The movie is funny, but this face, isn't.

Throw in a couple of short funny cameos from Eric Stonestreet (Cameron from Modern Family) and Thomas Lennon (Lt. Dangle from Reno 911) and Bad Teacher becomes a well-rounded comedy that may not ultimately have the same appeal as Bridesmaids or The Hangover, but isn’t a bad way to spend a night out at the movies.

GRADE: B+

Special thanks to AMC Theaters for sponsoring this review. If you’re going to the movies, I recommend AMC Theaters, they serve beer there. Just kidding, they don’t, but they’re still a pretty cool and comfortable place to watch a movie.  Actually some theaters do sell beer now, so go to those first, but if you don’t have any in your area, a regular AMC will do just fine.