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This…Is American Idol…Blog (Road To Hollywood Auditions)

Who would have guessed that starting a new job and being buried under 4 feet of snow would cause me to be backed up on my Idol watching as well as my recaps?  At least I still have my good hygiene, that hasn’t been effected by work or snow.  And who needs a gym membership anymore?  Just shovel snow for two hours, that should be more than enough exercise to cover you for a month.

Anyway, for those who are reading this, do not be confused, this is not a recap of last night’s Hollywood show, but instead it’s last Wednesday’s “Road To Hollywood” recap – which is basically sounds better to Idol producers than saying “These Are Some Good Auditions We Didn’t Show In Previous Episodes Because We Were Too Busy Showing You Bad Auditions.”  Actually this is a pivotal show.  You got to think that if they’re dedicating an entire episode to extra ticket winners, that these are some of the contestants we should keep an eye on.  Either that, or they had an extra hour to fill and we’re getting paid oodles of money from sponsors.

And since I’m wayyyy behind, I’m going to recap each performer tonight in 10 words or less.  Awww yeah, it’s express Idol…here we go.

Uh, first off, I don't like Seacrest saying "our biggest audition comes to a climax."  Especially when that's followed up with a 5-minute "Pants On The Ground" montage.  This is really funny, however, I'm setting June 1st as the deadline where it's no longer funny and then gets moved into the "ok, it's getting old now."

Jessica Furney - much better than last year's audition.  Simon can write music?

Amanda Shectman - drama queen,  but does good Britney impersonation.  has cankles.

Lee Dewyze - that was a de-wise song choice.  this year's Gokey.

Crystal Bowersox - awesome voice, almost gave me chills. needs a shower.

And now a fake-out montage, always love a good fake out - Gilbert Gottfried has the best one of all-time, check out the video below and skip to the 3:15 mark (but I recommend watching the whole thing, it's fantastic!)

Lacey Brown - made top 50 last year, worse this year, very disjointed.

Stephanie Fisher - no relation, thank god!  Seven strikes and you're out.

Rachel Hubbard - Jonas brother creepily eyeing this talented 16 year old.

Thaddeus Johnson -Neil Patrick Harris creepily eyeing this talented 16 year old.

Genesis Moore - No one creepily eyeing her.  Phil Collins should guest judge.

Adrian Chandtchi - uh...um...well...yeah...ok then...

Michael Lynche - already know his fate, disqualified from Top 24 supposedly.

Didi Benami - she's like Brooke White if Brooke White had real talent.

Aaron Kelly - singing Miley better than Miley isn't a tall order.

Kimberly Bishop - please stop sniffing glue.

Shaddaii Harris - this one is getting special recognition and much more than 10 words.  No joke, before Shaddaii started to sing and during her intro package, Maggie, with a straight face and all the seriousness in the world, said "I don't what it is, but I just got this strange feeling that she's going to win Idol this year.  I just feel it."  You be the judge...is Maggie nostradamus or nostradumbass?

Hope Johnson - ok, but more like in the way plain yogurt tastes.

That's all from "Road To Hollywood" but next week, we get Ellen.  And I don't care what anyone says, I'm very confident she'll be a GREAT addition to the show.

RANKING THE GOLDEN TICKET WINNERS
1. Crystal Bowersox
2. Didi Benami
3. Lee Dewyze
4. Michael Lynche
5. Jessica Furney
6. Hope Johnson
7. Thaddeus Johnson
8. Lacey Brown
9. Rachel Hubbard
10. Aaron Kelly
11. Amanda Shectman
12. Genesis Moore

OVERALL POWER RANKINGS
1. Andrew Garcia
2. Mallorie Haley
3. Crystal Bowersox
4. Danelle Hayes
5. Justin Williams
6. Ashley Rodriguez
7. Didi Benami
8. Lee Dewyze
9. Jermaine Sellers
10. Tyler Grady
11. Haeley Vaughn
12. John Park
13. Janell Wheeler
14. Katelyn Epperly
15. Michael Lynche
16. Matt Lawrence
17. Mark Labriola
18. Leah Laurenti
19. Paige Dechausse
20. Dave Pittman
21. Jessica Furney
22. Tasha Layton
23. Brittany Starr James
24. Chris Golightly
25. Nicci Nix
26. Hope Johnson
27. Lloyd Thomas
28. Kimberly Carver
29. Benjamin Bright
30. Thaddeus Johnson

Coming soon, Hollywood Round #1

One Response

  1. that Garcia kid is this years idol
    would he be the first Mexican/latino to do so

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